"In 2013, I admitted my problem & entered recovery for a cocaine addiction I'd been battling since my twenties. A daily habit of booze & blow kept me in a deep depression. My body betrayed me, & my once slim frame was nearly 250lbs"
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Meet @butlerraines sharing his #yogasavedmylife story as part of a series of stories highlighting the inspirational work of @trinifoundation bringing yoga & tuition scholarships to those fighting addiction. These are Butlers words💚
. "I gave up the drugs, but I was not willing to give up drinking. My life centered around the whiskey drinking Southern boy persona I had created. No beer, wine. Straight whiskey
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Six months later I was living above a garage at a coworker’s house. My living "space" was disgusting: a reflection of my self-worth. My money had run out. I couldn't borrow from friends any longer. Sitting there in the dark, the filth, with a bottle of JD; ashamed, sometimes suicidal. Desperate for something different, I searched "beginner’s yoga Atlanta"
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I walked into Balance Yoga Atlanta in January 2014 for a beginner’s yoga series. I knew nothing about yoga
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Little did I know the impact this practice would have on me. The community & teachers, so open & loving. They mentioned Ashtanga, how it was different from other styles. We were encouraged to commit to a daily practice & suspend judgement of how our poses looked. Commit. Show up, breathe; be where you are. That is what I did
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My practice became my controlled variable, & I was able to tell how my body was affected by what I consumed. I paid more attention to my diet so I wouldn't feel stiff. I saw my body change. It became apparent to me, no matter how often I practiced, something was preventing me from progressing. I was always injured, even though I had not advanced much in my practice. I was ultimately forced to face the damage drinking was doing
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I stopped drinking 680 days ago. My mind & body are stronger than they were in my twenties. My yoga practice is not easy for me, and it's not full of love & light. It is often a sweaty mess in a puddle of self-judgement & emotions. But every day it teaches me lessons, & I get stronger. I am grateful 🙏 Butler"
