"It'll be eight years this year since life spun in a thousand directions. What I now understand was a hypofunction of my right vestibular nerve led me to the ER after two days flat staring at my spinning apartment ceiling in NYC. I was doing everything right. I had a great job, social life, lived in NYC
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. "4 am - Tuesday - 2012: Wake up, room spinning, rolled out of bed panicked: "I need to stand up", I thought, "why's everything spinning?" I stood & vomited on my rug. I couldn't fix my eyes on anything, I stumbled to the bathroom. I called my dad "I'm so scared", but wasn't sure what to say
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I ended up in hospital the following day
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In the weeks following: I walked with a cane, tried not to fall. Most days I was flat on my back. I went to vestibular PT. I attended yoga classes; found a melting happen in my heart, which was new. Yoga had always been an afterthought, something I skipped out on at the end, in college (savasana, who needed it) - “it’s just stretching”. After having that episode of vertigo, it was the only exercise activity I could do without becoming dizzy or falling over, period
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But something I never expected also began to happen: my heart, soul, and mind started to melt over the practice… I cried in savasana after a couple of classes, I remember asking the teacher why that was happening
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Since, I've earned a doctorate in physical therapy & my yoga practice deepened. I've had episodes of spaciness, anxiety. It took time but my soul finally feels closer to who I was before. I might not have realized the unending grace of yoga, or the beauty in rehabilitation without that happening
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I am lucky. It's difficult when you're in the middle to see what might be on the other side. Things may/may not happen for a reason. If we pay attention, life has divining rod moments that direct toward the light we crave. When the road seems toughest, you’re growing. When I surrendered, it changed my life
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I hope my story inspires you. It may seem heavy, but sometimes you are simply starting a new chapter
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📸@mikejazz24