"I'd never considered myself the ‘typical asian’ girl growing up, I had difficulty accepting the quirks that made me unique. I wished for a svelte body, a softer look, sleek straight hair, a quieter demeanor, & a voice that embodied femininity & grace. I tried everything I could to fit in with my idealized mold of the asian girl - I starved myself, I stopped lifting to atrophy my muscles, I held my tongue, I even practiced changing the pitch of my voice. I was lost... completely lost in who I was trying to be
The 1st yoga class I wandered into at 17, I was completely lost, anorexic, full of anger & self-hate, with shallow hopes of achieving a more feminine look. I vividly remember that moment where everything changed: I was in a seated forward fold when I suddenly felt a rush of emotions. I remember crying, not understanding why, but allowing the wave of emotions to run through me as though, cleansing my soul. I walked out transformed & brought the practice home with me - a mental & physical connection that later transformed into a spiritual awakening
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It wasn’t until age 26 that I started to engage with a more physical practice, learning just how much empowerment & fearlessness resided within me. Discovering the ‘impossible’ was the possible waiting to happen
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I often wondered what my life would have looked like if I had found yoga earlier. Would my body not hold the scars it holds today from self-inflicted harm? Would my esophagus & GI system not be damaged from years of anorexia? Would I not have wasted so many years separating myself from my family? All I know is Yoga changed my life, & I am grateful for having wandered into that first class lost just to be found
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When I finally got to know & accept myself for ME, that I felt free. Breaking away from 'ideals': celebrating each quirk that made me uniquely me. Not only celebrating, but sharing it...because chances are there’s someone else out there who feels like they don’t belong in a traditional mold. I’m here to say: you don’t...you are born to create your own 💚
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📸@sphogat29